miss emma.

i've experienced a lot of let-downs and heartaches in the past few years...which isn't saying much because a minor setback to the average person is a life altering dilemma to me. my life is pretty perfect from the outside-looking-in, but i have this really disturbing habit of creating issues inside my head. anyway, i've been meandering in my life and not really knowing what i want to do or where i want to go and i'm realizing that:

a.) i am much too blessed to feel sorry for myself or to take my blessings for granted and not maximize my potential.

b.) life is too short to be scared of disappointment or to be indecisive.

c.) i have so many people to support me, regardless of my choices.

d.) taking risks maximizes personal growth.

this all came to me today at sing noel when i was sitting next to my mom, who was being super irreverent and blackberry chatting my sister. haa just kidding. my mom is my inspiration. she's my backbone, my shoulder to cry on, my snuggly hug after a bad day, my homemade macaroni and cheese, my lit up christmas tree. without my mom, i am nothing. but anyway, i was sitting there and listening to all of these very talented musicians and i remembered how i wanted to take singing lessons when i was little but i just never got around to it. granted, i don't think lessons from even the finest professional could help me, but it was just something i didn't take advantage of. an opportunity that i passed by. and then i started thinking of everything else i could've done...all the chances i've had, all the paths i've been offered. i'm not one to sit here and regret my past, but who am i to not be something incredible? i've been given every possible advantage in this life, and what a shame to waste it. 

so, in short, i am taking control of my life as of today.

and i'm quite serious about it.

tis the season.